Why You Need to Follow Your Heart. Time Waits for No One

As I'm sitting here with my late-time cuppa, cloudy weather and writing in English, my inner reality couldn't be more different than what's really happening outside this room. But that's what dreamers and idealists do. Or at least that's what I have been told.

I always loved escaping into words and daydream. When I was a kid, it was all productive and such, as it was my job to have an imagination an develop interesting worlds and stories. The worlds I was constructing had strong visuals and fierce heroes. But that was back to the time of dinosaurs. Kids today are technology-bound, well adapted to a world of gadgets and science.

But what about one's soul? What about one' purpose?

My generation lived mostly in its head and thoughts. This generation lives more in its social media pages or apps. Things change and there's nothing wrong with that! It would be pretty hypocritical of me to criticize tech, as I'm writing this from a wireless-connected laptop, as I just finished a mini-browsing of my Facebook and Instagram.

All that I'm saying here is that we need a return to ourselves, to our inner beings, to our hearts. We are so connected, so informed, so skilled, so prepared nowadays, that we forget to stand still and often find ourselves on autopilot. Mostly like a machine.

It all comes back to the soul. To the heart. To the purpose.

For the past 7 years, my life has been like the one of a hamster on a treadmill. That's the typical image of a 30-something in this century. I was doing all of what society and peers were expecting of me, yet I wasn't fulfilled. "Things can't always be perfect!" I kept telling myself in order to soothe that restlessness I had inside. Over and over again.

Numbing life with life and getting smacked down by life.

Ironically enough, our minds are not the masters of the lives we have. We might... think we have control over what's happening, but if we don't take conscious choices, if we don't stand up and fight for what we believe in, it all happens to us. And then it leaves us with a lesson to learn and a question to answer: "Will you follow your heart?".

Again and again, life decided to give me some "subtle" pokes. 

As a storyteller, I dreamed of becoming a movie director, to be able to tell stories through image, sound and words. Life happened. Peer pressure made me give up because "There's too much competition! You'll lose precious time! Take the safe path!". Ended up studying Sociology for four years instead. 

Yeah! Like this proved to be the "safe path". Either way, it was my choice.

Finished Uni, got admitted to a Master's programe, got my first job as a Life Insurance Consultant (the irony of selling life protection when mine was going to be tumbled down!). 

Life happened. My mother got breast cancer

That marked my first meeting with chronic disease and full-on regret. Feeling sorry for all that I made wrong, for all that I should have or shouldn't have said made me realize that we always have a choice to how we act. We always have a choice to do or not to do something. I chose to be strong for her and look for stability. I wasn't living for myself. I was now living for her. 

So I changed jobs to a place that in other conditions I never would have looked at. 

But I ended staying there for two and a half years. I learned how mean and double-faced human nature can be, and how damaging stress can be. Looking back, this experience also taught me to be humble and serve others, despite of their behavior. I was beginning to learn life. 

At the end of those years, I chose me above all else, and quit. The pressure on my emotions was too big and wanted to brake free. I give my praise to God that my mother recovered and is still a part of my life. It made me begin to lose Ego.

Got another job in sales and vehicle management coordination, and felt at ease. I was beginning to get back to myself bit by bit. But after only seven months, and having the past experience of feeling trapped in a place I didn't belong, I chose to leave and pursue my own thing (once more) in graphic design. 

I had just finished a beginner's course and was preparing for my final exams, Steve Jobs just died and made me become aware of my own limited time. I compulsively watched his Stanford 2005 Commencement Speech until it became engraved inside my mind. 

Although it was a normal consequence of life, death still scared me and put some anxiety all over my actions. Do things now!

So I did! Got the best results at the Graphic Design exam, and went into planning mode to pursue my dream. The focus was mostly on myself and on what I would achieve.

In came life again. Because, you know, shit happens! My grandma died

At the beginning of that year, the woman who was one of the pillars of my personality and the one that I drew much of my inspiration from was gone. Leaving me with an inflamed Ego and a big regret that I wasn't more time there for her.

Time doesn't wait for anyone. Life goes on even without your input. I needed to choose once again. I thought of her, and what would she want me to do. 

I just started a Photography course, as it was the closer that I could get to telling visual stories. Given the death of a close family member, many would have stayed at home for some days, grieve and then go back to their activities. But I chose to be strong once more and go to my course. 

So, that night I stayed at her wake, went to sleep at 7 am, rested for 4-5 hours, and then went to class. Nobody knew, nobody saw anything on my face. I kept it to myself. Once more, I chose to be strong for my family and do the right thing. There's a whole other story about this experience, but I'm not going to cover this now, maybe in a later post.

All these experiences were bringing me back to God

I always been like this. I grew up an Ortodox-Christian, not actually a church-goer, but passionate about all those stories in the Bible and God's goodness and protection. In my deepest despair, He is the one I turn to, He is the one my soul needs. Nothing else. Even if I do it unconscious, when I get afraid, I pray.

That year I prayed to be happy. I let my soul in His hands and prayed for it to be soothed. 

And it was. That fall I began a relationship with my best friend, a guy I've met at my Graphic Design course and that quickly became my go-to person. He is similar to me in so many ways (good and bad), that I really couldn't have asked for a better match. I wouldn't had known what to ask for! Our relationship grew stronger as months went by. We had our ups and downs, but it was all fine in the end. 

Life resumed its course. I got a job as a Shop Manager for a telecom retail company, got passed some of my limits, learned a lot about me and people once again. But something felt off again. Stress was much higher than my inner feeling of fulfillment. It ended up putting great strain on me, and I came to work only to wait anxiously to get back home to my plans, peace and quiet. So I left. It didn't feel right. 

As I felt myself calming down, I began to see things clearly and once more planned starting my own thing. 

Guess what?! Once more it didn't happen right!

I planned to get a job in order to raise money to start my own photography business. Found a job in sales, advertising space and client relationship. All good, all stressful as always, but it was comfortable. Somehow, my dream got postponed, as I never felt quite ready. I was scared shitless, to be honest!

Life grew bored with my behavior and decided to give me one more "poke". Into my right eye. On a Friday.

The time when it happened was just right, as I once more grew to comfortable into being pushed and pulled by life and not listening to my intuition. Whenever that happened, fear took command and made me settle, going totally against my dreams of always going for what it feels right.

I told the story of my multiple sclerosis diagnosis here. The thing that I would like to add to it is that as I write this story, I understand that our lives are empty without doing something with purpose, without really using the gifts we have been given. 

I have always loved to write and tell stories. I was always able to leave myself aside in times of great distress and turn to helping others.

Now you tell me. What do you choose: a life that happens to you, or one designed by choice? 

Because things will always happen, go well, go bad, get stuck, or anything else. But what really matters is what you do with the cards that you have been dealt, and how you use them to serve others? 

For me, that's what life is all about: smart choices. God knows what He's doing. Always!

Liked this post? Subscribe HERE, to be sure we stay connected. Let me know if you’d want me to write a more extensive piece on this topic, or on smaller topics from it. Would love to hear your opinion on this! Leave your comments down below.

Sincerely yours,

Denisa

What's Your Worst Multiple Sclerosis Fear?

Fear is an innate emotional response to danger. We have a choice: either we stand and fight or we run for shelter. Challenge or safety, the danger is still there. All that counts is how you react to it. The worst thing you could do is pick neither of these two and simply do nothing. Lack of action is worse than running away. It’s accepting the destruction. It’s being defeated from the very beginning.

Many of us think that after such a diagnosis, our lives need to be those of sick people. Many of us behave like sick people. Many of us think we are victims. You are a victim if you choose to be one. How you react to what is happening to you defines who you are.

Let’s Put A Face To That Danger

Define your nightmare. The absolute worse that can happen MS-wise. Write it down: “If I do x thing, my MS will …….”. Envision it in full detail. And then think what steps could you take to repair things, to bring the situation once more under your control?

If you were to measure the impact the nightmare has on your life, where would you place it on a scale from 1 to 10 (1 being the least impact and 10 being the biggest impact). Decide how bad you would be affected by what you think it will happen if you act in a certain way.

And then ask yourself what are you putting off out of fear? We are all afraid of the unknown, but we also have lives, dreams and plans. What are you letting go because of your MS? Is it worth it?

You may be hurt of not being able to do something you love anymore. Seeing other people doing that makes you sad. You then reject that thing entirely. And to think that it once brought you so much joy and satisfaction.

Overcoming Dissability. The Emotional One

But there is a way out. Human beings are adaptable creatures. You can and will overcome all hardship in your life. You have it in you to do so. Instead of drowning in sadness and avoiding all the things that make you sad, confront them and adapt them to your current situation.

Want to dance and you are in a wheelchair? Dance in a wheelchair! Live your life according to the wishes of your heart, not by the shame you feel when other people are looking and judging what you do. You are your worst judge! It hurts not being able to do it the old way. Do it another way. Get creative.

Always Do The Things That Make You Happy

The thing we fear most in doing is what we most need to do. Step by step, by confronting one fear a day, we will soon be on top of all the negativity and anger that has been growing in our hearts since MS entered our lives. It tries to put you down, don’t let it. Fight it! Regain control over your emotions.

It can be done. For the past year, I was soaked in fear, anxiety and anger. To a certain extent, I still am for some days, because these emotions come back. But what really counts is how I manage them. I once surrendered to them and felt helpless, stressed and full of rage because of the cruelty of life.

Guess who had to suffer most?! Life? No, me.

You suffer the most when you accept all the negativity and despair. Life is uncertain for all human beings, sick and healthy, old and young, bad or good. We all grow old, get sick and die. It’s how you live until that moment comes that counts the most.

Do The Smart Choice: Change Your Lifestyle

I can’t even state how much does a lifestyle shift count in dealing with MS! Letting go of old habits that did harm you is crucial. You had all this time to indulge in all the consumerist society had to offer: coke, fast-food, staying up late and having a blast in the club, doing those extra hours at your well-payed job, skipping meals and all in all having a decadent lifestyle. Or you were healthy from the get-go, only to find yourself helpless in the face of a chronic disease.

And now you are scared because it has been all taken from you. You feel like you no longer have control over the choices you make in living your life. As a matter of fact you only now have the power to choose for real. Society chose for you all your life. You have been taught all you know. But you are scared enough now to make the right choices and fear making the wrong ones.

It's scary going on against the current, but you have to do it. I've done it and am still here, alive and well. With MS, but well mentally. Doing my best to keep my emotions afloat when times get rough. That's the truth, they will get tough. But they will also get better. Imagine a rollercoaster. Not so pleasant but in time you'll adapt to it.

What You Need To Do

Stop this anxiety and come back to common sense. It’s that simple. A healthy lifestyle change for MS is nothing but letting go bit by bit of all the things that harm you. It is all about choosing healthy food, as close to its natural state as possible. It is about taking time for yourself and just relax, lay down and breathe deeply; read a book, sleep, watch a movie.

Be in the moment and do not stress about what happened or is bound to happen. Then get off the couch and move. Or if you are in a condition you can’t get up, move nonetheless! Stretch, close your eyes and feel your body, touch it so that you can know it’s still there.

Hustle! Do it for you, do it to beat the fear. Crush the anxiety. Get back to you!

What If You Don’t Do It?

Think of what will cost you to postpone action. What you will need to spend physically, emotionally and financially if you don’t make a choice now. Think of the impact that MS would have on you if you keep the destructive habits that led you here in the first place. Be them physical or emotional. They helped your MS be. Change for the better and feel better gradually. 

What is your cost of inaction? How would you feel about it?

We all die in the end. It’s what we do until then that matters the most. What matters the most is how we live. What matters the most is what we left behind for future generations.

Do you want your legacy to be FEAR?

Until the next article, let’s talk about this. What is your worst MS fear?

Yours truly,

Alexandra

METAMORPHOSIS - ep. 8 - Create Your Reality. #30Letters from #yogacamp miniseries

Creation is a sensitive word for many reasons. Be it in an artistic or a religious way, the area of creativity and of making things with your own resources has encountered numerous views.

To create means to make something, to bring an idea into reality, through a certain shape. It means to give birth, to establish. We, ourselves are created by God via our parents.

When we are little, we create constantly. Our imagination and creativity are sparkling and abundant in new ideas, scenarios or things we want to manifest. What happens when we don’t have a certain item to make the game more real? We invent it, we create it out of mud, a stick or leaves.

The power to create is in our minds and hearts. And as we become adults, it is still there. We only just need to tap into that resource and we’ll be surprised at how our emotions, thoughts and even our daily lives eventually change.

Rediscover that sense of wonder. There’s a difference between hopeless daydreaming and making dreams a reality through actions and choices that help you get where you want.

Make use of what you have around in your life, of what ideas you have in your mind and of the emotions that you feel and want to feel. Channel negative emotions and use that energy to create something positive, something useful. An object, a meal, an entire lifestyle. You choose.

The mind is a powerful tool, as the heart is a sensitive one. It takes time to understand or change the way we feel. It takes intentional choices and actions.

The first step is to think at what you want to create for yourself: your own reality, your own state of mind, harmony, love, abundance?

Give thanks to God for whatever you already have and focus on creating a better life for yourself, in spite of all the hardships you may face. There’s always a bright side to life.

Thank you for being here! As always, transformation comes from within!

For the rest of the “METAMORPHOSIS” series, click here.

#30letters is a miniseries derived from the experience of being transformed by some of my choices, in this case yoga, a lesson about yourself and for yourself. #Yogacamp is a 30 day challenge created by the wonderful Adriene Mishler (@yogawithadriene) and shared for free on her YouTube Channel. Check it out here.

Sincerely,

Alex

METAMORPHOSIS - ep. 7 - Accept Yourself. #30Letters from #yogacamp miniseries

Transformation always starts from the inside-out. It starts with the conscious choice of needing and wanting to change your life for the better. With that urge to be the best version of you that you can possibly be. You start observing. Start planning. Start learning. And then you begin to change. It’s the start of a process that might go on your entire life. The goal is the journey. As corny as it might sound, it is the truth.

We all strive to arrive, to get there, to make it. And then we stop. Why stop? Your life isn’t over, right? As long as you are alive, you can constantly learn and experience new things, train to be healthier and aim to achieve more and more goals. Have failures and learn some more from those too. Get up after you fall and start again. Life isn’t a one shot do them all thing. It’s an opportunity to challenge yourself and grow. And one day, leave a legacy. Teach others how you made it where you are. But first comes acceptance.

Accept that some things cannot be changed just because you want them to right then and there. Changes take time and effort. They take action and more likely, positive actions. Things are always flowing, the natural law is to transform, to change, to exist in a shape and then in another. Simply put: it all flows, it all passes, it all shifts. That doesn’t mean things disapear. They just become something else and it’s up to you to decide what. Through the choices you make, through the actions you take, through the thoughts you have.

Accept your fears and they suddenly stop attacking your mind. Accept the anger and it calms down like a purring kitten after being petted. Accept your anxiety and it dissolves into thin air, leaving you at peace and calm. Trust in the power of accepting things, people, thoughts. Accept what and who you are. Accept your flaws and your quirks and your likings. Accept who you are, no matter what others say. Someone will always have something to criticize and comment. You can’t please everyone!

Accept your body, accept that you are not perfect, but perfectible. You can always improve something about you. It’s all about choice.

Accept that you can’t change people around you and accept them for who they are. Accept yourself. Accept that you get scared, accept your fears. But know that you are strong, healthy and safe. Accept that you get angry. Acknowledge that and move on, transform it.

You are kind and loving. Find love within. Love yourself and then you can fully love others. Accept that you get anxious. Really, really anxious. It’s OK to feel that. Being scared and lacking love at that moment makes it act like that. Breathe!

Be calm and focused. Approach everything with ease. Accept whatever you can’t change. Adapt. Have a kind heart. Accept your condition, accept your flaws, accept your pains, accept that things happen, that things flow.

The best choice you’ll make is accepting who you are and acting to please yourself every single day. Be your best friend. Accept yourself fully!

You are whole, you are NOW!

For the rest of the “METAMORPHOSIS” series, click here.

#30letters is a miniseries derived from the experience of being transformed by some of my choices, in this case yoga, a lesson about yourself and for yourself. #Yogacamp is a 30 day challenge created by the wonderful Adriene Mishler (@yogawithadriene) and shared for free on her YouTube Channel. Check it out here.

Sincerely,

Alex

#MSWorkability - Are You Ready for Work? Twittchat about Career andMultiple Sclerosis

Neurons were firing brightly on last evening’s twitt chat! Once more, the EMSP and Emma Rogan took the conversation about multiple sclerosis and work to the social media agora. Last year they invited us to twitt chat about work with MS management issues (read more about it here). This time, they partnered with The Work Foundation at Lancaster University to bring to life a new project called “Ready for Work”. Read on to find out more!

CONTEXT AND CONCEPT

Their collaboration is focused on supporting young people with MS into employment, and in time making it a purpose for clinical care. The project emphasizes the important relationship between doctors, patients and employers and the individuals’ abilities to work and continue their careers in today’s european socio-economic context.

As Lead Coordinator of “Ready for Work”, Emma Rogan introduces the concept of “workability”, which describes the situation of doctors clinically discussing the issue of work with their MS patients.

Multiple sclerosis is “usually diagnosed during the prime working years of a person’s life, between the ages 20-40” (@WorkFoundation) and the impact on the individual’s life of not being able to work is far greater than one can think. Not to mention the huge amount it costs the state to keep all MSers on welfare alone. Which usually is only a temporary thing anyway.

WHAT WAS DISCUSSED?

The common enemy here is the social stigma associated with illness. People who suffer from MS might end up with mild to severe disabilities, and that scares employers as much as it does the MSers themselves. Both are afraid of losing something: one risks losing profit, the other his or her’s whole life. It’s basically the same need: the one to survive in today’s world.

People are usually afraid of what they either don’t know or don’t understand. They tend to reject that thing by default. Prejudice is deeply engraved for most individuals. The key to better understanding and less fearing MS is more awareness. Hopefully, as people talk more and more about this illness, they will understand it more and fear it less. They will care.

In this context, employers (as well as the general public) need to be educated about what multiple sclerosis really means for the individual and what it also means in terms of costs and gains for their businesses and society at a larger scale.

For one, having a workplace and a peer community to go to everyday brings more social connection, thus avoiding social isolation that can deeply affect the quality of life of a person with MS. It also helps with gaining and sustaining financial independence and creativity into one’s life. Being involved in various projects and tasks gets one’s mind off the illness, whilst providing financial security.

Keeping MSers employed can actually cut costs and increase revenue for businesses, as they are still highly skilled, love their jobs and want to be of use and contribute to their workplace in spite of being diagnosed with a chronic and possibly debilitating disease. Their dedication and willingness to keep their jobs actually shows they are loyal, courageous and have lots of willpower to make it work. These are the kind of people every business should want working for them.

This is where the EMSP Toolkit for Employers can help a lot in understanding what needs to be done and managed when employing a person who has multiple sclerosis. At its very basic, this situation only needs minor adjustments like: flexible hours and the ability to work remotely / from home, cooling devices in the summer and a place to rest during lunch break.

Think of an MSer at work as if it were a smartphone: it does all this complex tasks, it solves lots of issues you might have, and after a while it needs recharging; after the battery is full, it can resume its tasks with the same excellent results.

"The relationship between doctor and patient also has to be an open and inclusive one" (@eumsplatform), to make work a crucial discussion topic during regular check-ups. Career and staying at work are essential things to all young MSers.

My personal belief is that a holistic approach to MS treatment is now needed. Medical, emotional, lifestyle and career factors and their balance make an individual a part of society. The collaboration between doctors, employers and patients is crucial.

Also, a good starting point would be a clinical test result to support one’s working skills and abilities. A medical certification that he or she is able to work within certain conditions and environments. Helping match the skills and career aspirations of young MSers to the demands of their work, will hopefully ensure access to good quality work and minimize the underutilization of their skills at the workplace (@eumsplatform).

On top of that, training the HR departments (where applicable) would be more than useful (@emmabear88), as oftentimes, MSers are afraid of disclosing their illness because of prejudice, of being seen as less capable and even of getting fired.

On the long run, the more cohesive a society is, the more it can withstand its hardships. So, in conclusion, the more we raise awareness and advocate for inclusion of all people in the workforce, the more diverse and powerful our societies will be.

Humans are social animals. We can’t survive so well on our own. A business needs skilled individuals to get things going forward. As a tribe thousands of years ago, it needs skills to evolve. Think about it: what happens if the right skills disappear when you fire an MSer? Just think about it!

CONCLUSIONS. WHERE TO NOW?

Support the “Ready for Work” Project. Spread the word. Use the EMSP Employee Toolkit to raise awareness and continuously educate. 

And last but not least, join the European Multiple Sclerosis Platform (@eumsplatform) and Emma Rogan (@emmadragon) once more on the 12-13th of March, as she takes over their Twitter page for an in-depth discussion on brain health, work and related issues. 

See you there! (or read you there!)

(Read the whole twitt chat here, #MSWorkability)

As always, wishing you the best,

Alexandra

Why Life Micromanagement Can Increase Anxiety?

We all want to be in charge of our life and all that relates to it. Let’s imagine it to be a beautiful, green forest. It has lots of trees, lots of shade, lots of shapes and sizes and a few dark corners where our worries and secrets lie.

One day, an unknown force takes over and lurkes inside, deeper and deeper. You pay more and more attention to every tree, to every leaf movement, to every sound. Everything in the forrest now has to have your whole attention. As time goes by, you end up so close to the trees that you get to see the little hairs on the back of the ant on the tree bark. And by doing so, you lose sight of the forest in all it’s grace and fullness. All that you can’t see or control scares you, and you get more and more tense.

The same with a chronic illness. It comes uninvited into your life, bringing worry, angst and fear of the unknown. You do all this research online, in books, you ask doctors, nurses. You begin to question yourself, everyday is another opportunity to learn more and more about this new thing that threatens to take over your body. Every minute becomes a good moment to analyze every single strange sensation or reaction that you might have. It’s a state of hyper-vigilance, a false state of being in control on what’s happening to you.

Almost a year has gone by since I’ve started treatment with Copaxone. Some find relief in having it, because it slows down the progression of the illness. And I know that. I am forever grateful for the chain of events that lead me to be able to have this treatment.

It makes me angry knowing that young people like me still don’t have acces to treatment, still aren’t being diagnosed or even taken into account, although they are contributors to the society I come from. This is one important topic about which you will be reading and hearing a lot more this year.

Getting back to today’s issue, what can a treatment do for my emotional state, for my thoughts and reactions versus an invisible illness, versus symptoms and relapses? It has some power over the relapse rate and illness progression, and I am again very grateful for that. But in terms of helping me get out of that dark place I was putting myself into… not so much.

In fact, it has somewhat made my anxiety even worse, as I had some not so good injections, many frustrations linked to injecting along the way, the constant reminder that I am sick and have an incurable disease and that I must rely on a needle to get some control. In the meantime, my internal control was losing balance.

On the surface all was good and well. I ate better, exercised, rested and relaxed as long as I needed to. It all seemed ok. But internally I was fearing a depresion comming in.

I consider it a very serious topic and don’t ever take it lightly. I had the opportunity to do my undergraduate thesis on depression in adolescents and I know how dangerous it can be.

All the angst I was feeling, all the gray and dull days I went through and the partial loss of the joy in my life made me look even closer into my emotions and lifestyle. But the harder I looked, the harder the truth was hiding away from me. The darker the forest became.

Rationally, I have been aware of this in me for a long time. Emotionally, I was still not accepting it. I scrutinized every new tingling, every needle-like sensation in the eyes, every clumsiness or fatigue. Although I knew that all these had more to do with not sleeping enough hours a night, hormonal changes or not paying enough attention to what I was doing, I kept that intensive, extensive watch. What if I wasn’t aware of a sudden change in my body or symptoms and then it all got worse?! What if it caught me off guard?

Last night I realised that I’m micromanaging my multiple sclerosis (symptoms, reactions, etc) and thus my entire life. Although I’ve made some great choices that help me feel good every day, there was always this watcher at the back of my mind, watcher that didn’t allow me to fully relax and enjoy the way my days went.

This time it was an emotional awareness. This was the source of all my rampant anxiety and fear. Given the micromanagement, anything that kept me from entirely controlling every aspect of my life got me angry, anxious and annoyed. Thus I couldn’t relax, enjoy the moment and live it fully.

This micromanagement was not fully present. I also had moments when I let go and those were the most memorable and dear to my heart. Those moments were the ones where I gave myself some space to breathe, to move, to just be. Those were the moments when I take a few steps back from the trees and begin to see the forest, the leaves, the shapes, the sky. These were the moments when I breathed deeply, hugged tightly and dreamt optimistically.

Now I open my eyes and will do  my best every single day. It’s the best gift I have: the choice to live bravely!

Repeating this might sound redundant, but getting to the root cause of all my missfortunes for almost two years now, was a real relief. The proverbial stone lifted of my chest and I could once more see the forest in all its glory. It was still there, moving as the wind blew by, with the trees of my self deeply rooted in experience, knowledge and watered by all the love and gratitude I felt inside my heart for all the good things in my life.

Going through this is a breath of fresh air. A real one after such a long time of giving in to my fears and scares.

Choose what’s best for you.

Choose yourself.

So, I encourage you to take a few steps back from whatever hardship you might be facing right now. May it be MS related, job related, relationships related or combined, it doesn’t matter. Mentally and emotionally, get away from it and look at how it is. Look at the real situation, no adding, no substracting. Look at it as it is, good or bad.

Once again, accept life for what it is. Let go of the worries that no longer serve you, grieve if you need to. Then take a deep breath to calm your mind. Close your eyes and picture what you can do to feel, be or make better. Open your eyes and look at your forrest. Work with what you have now. Focus on the positives, as hard as it might be, focus on what you still can do and do it fully and wholeheatedly.

Push through the sadness, the grief, the loss, the disability and the loneliness. People can help you, medicine can help you, but you are the only one responsible for your choices.

Choose to keep on living. Choose what’s best for you. Choose yourself.

Have a wonderful day!

Alexandra