About being scared

Have you ever been scared? So scared that you almost can’t move? That you almost can’t think? And most of all, that you almost can’t cry? Well I have been there, and thankfully came back. Not once, but several times since my MS diagnosis.

I’ve asked myself “What kind of person are you? Are you a coward? Are you weak?”. And the answer came immediately: “I am courageous, strong, but I get scared!”. Multiple sclerosis is not a little flower to deal with. It has quirks and bousts of anger and it all comes from within you. Your own body is attacking you. Could you deal with this? Knowing that randomly, your body decides to fail you, although it has been there for you for your whole life. Untill now.

Life is already a sum of uncertainties and surprises, good or bad. MS only adds up to that. Living life is not an easy task by itself. Not knowing if your body will go against you or not, whether your vacation will be carefree and if you will be able to care for your loved ones IS scary. The mere thought of losing control of one of your senses, or of one of your limbs, not being able to read, move or touch IS scary.

Funny how “scar” got into “SCARy”! MS scars are SCARy. You have the right to be afraid. You have the right to grief and cry your eyes off. You have the right to be angry. But you also have the OBLIGATION TO GET BACK TO YOURSELF!

Get healthy! Get fit! Get relaxed! Eat a proper diet, exercise as much as you can and try to not stress so much about multiple scerosis. The SCAR is there. Don’t rub it! You’re right! It’s SCARy. Now get on with life.



Alexandra Celic